My Kind of Busy

It was one of those weekends that I didn't think was going to be busy, but that's silly.  With four kids every day of life is busy. Every day. But I'm not complaining, this weekend was totally my kind of busy.  

Friday was another day off from school for the kids. We spent the afternoon at the library.  One of my most favorite places in the world.

Peyton was a good sport, but wouldn't really have anything to do with the little kid area.

Saturday there was more snow and more stuff to do.  We headed down to Detroit to volunteer at Cass Community Services (an amazing organization that is creating real change in the city).

We hung out with a great group of volunteers.

And then closed out the day with a quick game of hockey before the sun went down.  It was kids versus parents.  It got a little intense because well, we're all a little competitive.  At one point I somebody was belly-crawling along the ice to score a goal.  

Sunday was church, a few games of chess and then basketball.

Chess is almost as popular as hockey in my house right now and almost as intense.

There is nothing better than watching my girl run down the court with determination and confidence...going for it.

And there were a million other things in between.

Even though I may be too tired to write anything more or stay up to watch all of the Grammy awards, I feel happy.  Happy and with a heart full of love and gratitude.

Ready for the week.  Ready for the last week of January.  Bring it.

Questions, What I Know For Sure & #iPPP

It's been a pretty intense few weeks around here.  

From plunging wind chills (hello negative 25) to explaining what sex is.  I told my 9-year-old daughter about what it means to get your period.  I took all the kids to a funeral home for the first time (a very sweet, very old great uncle of my husband's died so we went. I am extremely uncomfortable at funeral homes and viewings.  I never went to one until I was an adult.  I had no idea what the right thing to do was.  And I have anxiety issues.  But I'm getting a little better and I want my kids to be better than me, so we went). It's been all life and death and puberty and oh holy hell, intense.

We've spent more time together than normal thanks to the million snow days off from school.  I've done a lot of talking and explaining and listening.  They've done a lot of talking and asking and noticing.

Do you believe in hell?  No? What if someone murdered someone?  What then mom?  
Do we have any more food?  
What is a wind chill?  
Do we have the "sssingreeedients" to make brownies? (Wade's pronunciation)
Is the F word that rhymes with cuck a bad word? Did you know that the F word has a cousin that's a P word?
Can I play on the "high-pad"? (Another Wade pronunciation)
What happens when we die?
How old are you?
How old is Grammy?
How old do I have to be to get an iPhone?
Do I have to?
Will you play with me?
What time is Dad getting home?
Is Justin Bieber going to prison?

These questions are just a sampling from just yesterday afternoon.  Now multiply that by 5,432 million and you get an idea of what life is like with a 12, 9, 7 and a 4-year-old the past couple weeks.  

I never really thought about how exhausting parenting older kids would be mentally.  I feel such a giant responsibility to thoughtfully, honestly answer all of their questions, even when it's an answer with more questions.  I feel so happy that they are asking and listening and that they care about my answers.  From what I hear, teenagers care a little less.  So I am taking my time with my answers, as much as our hectic life will allow.   

I want them to know I don't believe in hell but their dad does so they'll have to learn more and figure out what they believe as they get older.  I want them to know I get confused about wind chills but we can Google it together and learn more because that's a great question and it is totally dominating our life right now.  I want them to know I'm not sure what happens when we die.  I want them to know they have to because I said so.  I want them to know I will play with them almost every damn time they ask me.  I want them to know that even an entitled punk like Justin Bieber deserves a ton of compassion not ridicule or a bunch of "I knew this would happens."

Parenting older kids is exhausting, intense, absurd, fun, draining, interesting, eye-opening, awkward, funny, pretty wonderful ride I know that for sure this week.

What do you know for sure (this week)?

• Spectacular sunrises make subzero temps a little bit more bearable.

Another Hell Yeah Sky.  And um, yeah, no filter was used.

• I'm pissed. What the hell Captain and Tennille?  Doesn't anyone stay together anymore?  Maybe it's because I'm a child of divorce.  Maybe it's because I want people to stay together.  Maybe it's because Love Will Keep Us Together is one of my all time favorite songs and is on three of my iTunes play lists. Whatever it is, I'm really sad that they are divorcing.

• Moms' answers and insight can make a difference. I love what Joseph Gordon-Levitt says his mom taught him about being a feminist.  Right on!

• People that perform Random Acts of Kindness are beautiful people.  I was the recipient of one of those beautiful people's kindness this week.  The piano lesson checks not cashed? Really? Oh my. I cried.

• I love the Blank on Blank videos from PBS Digital.  I've enjoyed interviews with Kurt Cobain, Grace Kelly, Tupac and more.  But this one from Carol Burnett is my favorite.  It's funny and sad and sweet and real.  And I love it so much. Click here to check out the blank on blank YouTube channel.

• Watching my oldest and my youngest together makes me happy.  I just know that for sure.  It's all kinds of great.

And face hats (what I like to call Wade's bank robber look he's sporting here) are really wonderful if you live in subzero land in the winter.

• I can't stop thinking about this song or playing it--Ferron's Girl On A Road.  I have this really rad friend/mama-cool-person mentor who co-hosts a radio show.  She played this on her show on Saturday and I fell in LOOOOOOVE.

What do you know for sure (this week)?  C'mon, we're friends, share what you know. 

Leave a comment here or on my Facebook page or on Twitter.

Please come play with me on Instagram @jumpingwithmyfingerscrossed. 

I'm linking up today with my friends Greta from  Gfunkified.com and Robin from FarewellStranger.com for the #iPPP link up.  They host a link up where they encourage people to share "your funny, your yummy, your heartfelt, your favorite photos of the week" from our phones. 

Beautiful

When I was little I shaved my arm.  I remember nervously taking my mom's pink disposable razor and  putting it directly on my skin.  I slowly moved it up my forearm a few inches.  I was being very careful.  And then suddenly I heard my mom coming down the hall and I threw the razor into the shower and ran to my room.

I shaved my arm because I thought my arm hair was ugly.  I was embarrassed.  I was ashamed.  I was 9.  Shaving my arm didn't make me feel more beautiful. I felt guilty for using the razor without telling/asking my mother.  I felt silly walking around with a two inch bald spot on my oh-so hairy arm.  I felt stupid.

I haven't thought about the arm shaving incident of 1985 in a very long time.  But I did last night after watching an amazing short film about beauty that explores how mothers can pass down insecurities to their daughters.  According to a recent study,  72% of daughters learn about beauty from their mothers.


(If you are an email subscriber, click here to watch.)
The film is 8 minutes loooong, but totally worth watching.

Oh hell.  After watching the movie, I went into Lucy's room where she was still up reading and I asked her if she thought she was beautiful.  She said "yeah" like she wasn't sure.  I was surprised.  I asked her if there was something she didn't like about herself.  She said "my arms are hairier than all the other girls' arms in class."

I have to believe that hairy arms must be a pretty common insecurity among 9-year-old girls.  Right?  I mean I haven't mentioned hating my arm hair.  I haven't given a rat's ass about my arm hair since 1985. She didn't get that one from me.

But the whole thing got me thinking.  What have I mentioned?  Have I talked about my big thighs?  My pretty impressive weight gain over the last six months?  Have I mentioned my crooked teeth from  never wearing my retainer when Dr. Seabold told me to?  Have I mentioned my wrinkles that keep appearing?  What has she heard?

Over the years, I've been very careful about what I say in front of both Lucy and her brothers.  Not just about my physical insecurities, but all the rest too.  I'll admit when I am uncomfortable in social situations and point out that we're all different.  Or I'll apologize for not being so organized and then point out that everyone deserves compassion and forgiveness.

But Lucy is at the age when things start to get crazy for girls.  The other night we talked about a lot.  We talked about beauty.  We talked about changes, yeah all those changes, that girls and women go through. [Think it's too soon to talk about this stuff?  Nope.  Not even if there's 'nothing going on.'  Check out this article my friend wrote for AllParenting- Is Puberty before age 10 the new normal?] I gave Lucy a book to read.  

This book is a good starter.
We are making our way to Are You There God? It's Me Margaret

I actually really enjoyed talking with her about all of it (um, it's a much easier talk than the dreaded sex talk I've had with my older child).  She was witty and funny and thoughtful about all of it.  I fell in love with her even more. I mean come on, a tween girl that can be witty and funny about a period?  She's brilliant.  It gives me hope that she'll be able to handle some of this scary you-aren't-beautiful-unless-you-are-a-certain-weight-height-hair-color girl bullshit that will soon be shoved down her throat from everywhere.

The movie, the book, the talk, my amazing daughter...they all made me think about what I hear about my own beauty.  And what I accept and put out into the world.  I'm taking part, sort of, in the 365 Feminist Selfie project.  Have you heard of it?  The point of this project is to take selfies, yes selfies, to show and see real women.  Veronica Arreola from the blog Viva La Feminista started this project.  She says "the photos are about the real you.  They aren't supposed to be the glam you (although those are welcomed).  The foundation of this challenge is to conquer the fear of seeing yourself every.single.day.  We might look at ourselves to put our contacts in, even makeup on, but taking a selfie and posting it means really looking at yourself.  And hopefully at the end (or much sooner) you will find it less painful and more enjoyable.  I don't want to turn us into Paris Hiltons, but rather individuals who don't cringe when we need to take a photo."

I don't do it everyday.  But the selfies I have taken have been raw, honest moments.  Pictures of my life and me that are beautiful.

Instagram  Caption: Determined to be healthier & more accepting of myself this year. #365FeministSelfie

Instagram Caption: Skating outside w/my kids=happy. #365FeministSelfie 

Instagram Caption: WAHM-Night shift #365FeministSelfie

Instagram Caption: This is what happens when I say I'm going to lie down for a few minutes. #fullhouse #imnotmad #blessed #365FeministSelfie

The movie, the book, our talk, this project and my amazing daughter all have me thinking about what is beautiful.  Beautiful to me is acceptance of ourselves and appreciation for our bodies and NO SHAME.  Beautiful to me is creative self-expression, respect and love and truth.  These values of beauty are what I hope all my children carry with them into adulthood.

What is beautiful to you?  Are you taking part in the 365 Feminist Selfie project?  Do you take selfies? 

On Instagram?  Follow me here  http://instagram.com/jumpingwithmyfingerscrossed

Pinterest Inspiration Poser Challenge (MLK Day, Nutella & More About My Dixie Cup Lights)

I may get all bogged down in the stress and high expectations of Christmas, but I truly love MLK Jr. Day.  I so enjoy having meaningful discussions with my kids and seeing/hearing the world through them.  

(I know it's a day late, but maybe you could do this next year or use this for anytime of the year.)

Every year we read an age-appropriate book about Martin Luther King's life.  (Our favorite especially for younger kids is Martin's Big Words by Doreen Rappaport.)  Then we create a wall of words, words that they feel represent Dr. King's message.  This year, I switched it up a bit, inspired by Pinterest, I asked them to write/draw about what their dreams were for our family and the world.  And this is what we ended up with:

Some of them got very specific.

Some of them were a bit more abstract.

For years, my kids have been writing, directing and performing a skit based on the teachings of Dr. King. Some years all the kids have wanted to perform, other years not so much.  It's not mandatory.  But they usually dig it.

This year's is short, but awesome.  




Both these projects are easy and free and wonderful and inspiring and funny and full of love.


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Sometimes it's good to be a little fancy.  Sometimes it's good to over the top.  But sometimes it just isn't worth it.  Sometimes Nutella Hot Cocoa is no better than good old instant Swiss Miss Hot Cocoa.  Yeah, I said it.  Now all you homemade, creative organic hot cocoa types are cringing and I'm sorry.  But hey listen I am no Pinterest Poser.  I tried it and Swiss Miss won the taste test (and it was a hell of a lot easier).

*In an attempt at not being a Pinterest Poser,** every week I  detail a new Pinterest challenge whether it be a new recipe or a craft.   

**My definition of a Pinterest Poser is someone who is all pins and no substance.**

I hooked my family on Nutella a couple years ago.  It tastes delicious and it's gluten free which is a big bonus in our house.  But the hot cocoa took it too far.

The recipe is easy.  I managed to "burn" it, but still, it's easy for most people.  I served up a non-burned batch of the fancy hot cocoa to my kids and.....I got a "eh, yeah, it's okay."  Um, what?  "Here, give me that," I said grabbing it out of his hands.  "Kid, it's Nutella, it has to be amazing."

But eh, yeah, it was okay.
Let me tell you what would have been better, heating up a some water and dumping in a cheap, gluten free packet of Swiss Miss.  Top it off with a little whipped cream and BAM instant crowd pleaser.

Sometimes fancy isn't better.  Sometimes over the top isn't so good.  Sometimes an old-school instant is the best.

Here's the recipe if you want to go ahead and try it though:

-2-5 Teaspoons of Nutella
-2 cups of Milk

Add the ingredients into a saucepan and whisk until well mixed.  Heat to desired temp and serve.
(I screwed up on the whisking the first time, it's very important.)

                           *************

This past summer on Instagram I used the hashtag #frontporchchronicles because it was my most favorite space and where so much love and life happened.  It was all because of Pinterest-inspired projects--the door turned into a table, the artwork, the paper garland, etc.  

And now, my indoor favorite space, where so much love and life happens is getting it's own Instagram hashtag-- #dixiecuplightschronicles.  I am obsessed.

Come on over and follow me on Instagram and play.

And while you're following me, head on over and follow my Pinterest boards.

Here are some of the projects I've attempted--the good and the bad:

Dixie Cup Lights- click here

DIY Ornaments-click here

Gluten Free Clay- click here

Make Your Own Stamps- click here
Birthday Shirt- click here
Gluten Free Pop Tarts- click here
Front Porch Kid Art Display- click here
Door turned into Table- click here

Summer Wish List Chalkboard-click here

Peanut Butter Nutella Cookie Sandwiches-click here

Painted Mason Jar Vases-click here

Cinco de Mayo Paper Flowers- click here

Earth Day Cupcakes- Click here

Nail Art-click here

Homemade Photo Booth Fun- click here

Fake Bangs- click here

DIY Subway Art- click here

Furniture Painting and Bench/Chest Makeover- click here

Thanksgiving-y Project/Gratitude/Holiday Countdown- click here
The Smoothie-click here

The Free Printable Turned Artwork in a Boring Hallway- click here

The chalk board-click here
Seven Layer Dip in Individual Cups (my favorite so far!)-click here
The pumpkin address-click here
The Kitchen Dancing Sign--click here

Oh yeah, and come follow me on Twitter @AngelaYBlood and subscribe to my MomPulse YouTube channel here.