Wednesday, February 17, 2016

A Working Mom Cliche

So I'm working now, a lot. I'm working more hours at the preschool. I'm writing like crazy for the other job and even spent some time being all corporate-y the other day. I spent hours in a building with co-workers and even wore a blazer. Yup. I am bringing home the bacon. I mean some, not that much, but a little bacon.

Because I'm completely immature, I had to take a selfie in the corporate bathroom with signs like this. I thought I was hilarious.

For the most part it feels pretty good. I love contributing some bacon. And helping pay bills. And I love a lot of parts of both jobs--the sweet kiddos, the challenges, trying to make customer service sound Ahhhhmazing for the corporate folk, the people, wearing pjs to work at the preschool and wearing a blazer to the corporate-y gig. It's fun. It's fascinating. I like that my kids see me in a different light.

But yo, it's definitely challenging. There are a lot of times I feel like my head is spinning. My house is A DISASTER. I've made more gluten-free sandwiches for dinner than ever before. Days are jam freaking packed and I want more time. More time to do laundry, answer emails, hang out with the kids, actually talk to Tim, do more work, cook better dinners, walk the dogs, watch Real Housewives, work out, make to-do lists, sleep, ahhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!

What's funny though, is that Tim's life doesn't seem to have altered that much. He still does what he did before. And so do I. Yeah, I still do all the cooking, shopping, laundry, cleaning AND now some working. I cannot fucking believe I have become another cliche. Before this phase, I was the stay-at-home mom blogger who drove a minivan, um hello cliche. Now I am the working mom who does too much and then complains about it on her blog. Are you kidding me? How did this happen? 

I mean I'm supposed to be this incredibly liberal feminist married to a somewhat progressive conservative.  We were supposed to be better than this, more balanced, less traditional.

I guess it's an adjustment for all of us. For almost 12 years, I stayed home and took care of all the home stuff so I get that we need to maybe have a meeting and redistribute responsibilities. (Look at all that corporate meeting stuff rubbing off on me already. lol!)  The only thing is that Tim seems completely fine if some things just don't get done. He is perfectly okay to sit next to a laundry basket full of clothes waiting to be folded and NOT fold them. He is okay with playing a video game on his phone. He is more than okay with it, he seems totally happy and relaxed.

Maybe I need to learn to let some of the things go a little like Tim. Maybe.  Who knows? I have ZERO answers. I'm new at this. 

There was this article on Huffington Post about "having it all" that went viral this week. It's interesting and funny and rings true in parts to me. But I'm totally not trying to have it all or get ahead in any super driven career path. I mean I love my life. I'm just trying to do the best at jobs I'm getting paid to do and help pay bills and be the best parent and enjoy my family and life. That's all. 

This clip from Black-ish is more where I am right now....I love this.

(click here to watch the clip)

Tim plays a Simpsons game on his phone and every now and then Homer's voice will say something from his phone. If he gets a point or something Homer says "Better him than me. Doh." Yeah. While I'm stressing about laundry and balance and oh my god how do I do not all of it but most of it!!! Tim is playing  a Simpsons game on his phone. Oh.My.God.

We'll figure it out or we'll bicker and laugh about it and revel in our cliche-ness.  Life is intense in good and bad ways. It's full. It's busy. And hey, I'm bringing home some bacon.

And oh my god, since I talked about bringing home the bacon I thought I would put in the commercial from the 80s. You HAVE to watch this. No wonder we are so screwed up with expectations and roles and responsibilities. I mean this is nuts, hilarious, but nuts.

(click here to watch it)


  1. I so get this, except when I'm working, all the kids see is me on my computer. I try and shit of all down when they get home from school, but that means I lose time, especially if I've had to spend some of my day grocery shopping or running errands, or you know what? Sometimes I just want to be selfish and do something for me. So then I end up working at night as well. It's so hard to balance!

  2. When I started blogging, I told my husband "I am committing to this. This means that I need more help from you in all these ways" and then I listed all the jobs I do that I needed him to help me with in the running of our household. He basically said uh, yeah. Nope. My job trumps yours. Which was infuriating!! Over time he has stepped up and reorganized himself a little to revolve around our needs, which I have been doing for years We have had many conversations about him having to sacrifice a little for the good of the unit, which was totally unfamiliar territory for him. And he has learned not to be okay with the overflowing laundry basket, if only because he knows I'll flip out if I see it. Baby steps.

  3. All the yups, my friend, all of them!!!!!