Thursday, February 28, 2013

Confliction (& a vlog)

I am a feminist.  I've said it before.  I've also previously mentioned that I am a liberal, a mother, a Methodist, a sister, a terrible housekeeper, a wife, a writer, a red wine lover and a Sunday school teacher among other things.
Nothing says "feminist" more than this picture. 

Sometimes I am full of conviction and know exactly how I feel about a certain issue.  Other times I am full of confliction.  

"I can't wait to get my ears pierced this weekend," Lucy announced at dinner the other night.  She is turning 9 at the end of the week and getting her ears pierced is high on her wish list.  

"When can I get my ears pierced," JT, my 6-year-old son asked.

Hmmmm.  Confliction.  I don't know how to explain why he can't.  Why can't he?  

My husband told him that boys can't, they just can't.

"I'm not sure why in our society it seems more okay for little girls to have earrings and not for little boys, but if you feel really strongly about getting your ears pierced when you are a teenager we can revisit that," I said.

My husband shot me a look that said "oh great, I knew that hippy side of you that I thought was sooo cool when we dated would come back to haunt me."

Then the dinner conversation led to tattoos and more talk of how "I don't regret getting mine and if you want to express yourselves through body art when you are adults and can pay for it, we'll love you no matter what."  I thought my husband was going to choke on his dinner.

But really!  As a parent, I feel confliction.  Aside from all the societal oddities of what is accepted and what's not, I feel like a hypocrite. One because I have a tattoo and I have my ears pierced so how can I talk about not getting them when they are older? And deep down I don't want Lucy to get her ears pierced or JT to get tattoos.  Either I've been married too long to a conservative husband or I indeed have my own inner old, conservative lady showing herself.

I feel the same way about music.  I love pop music.  I love swearing.  I love swearing in pop music.  But I don't love my kids hearing it.  And why is it okay to say "bitch" on the radio but not "ass."  And what about movies? And television? all things that fall under the technology category? advertising? Oh Jesus, my confliction knows no end.

Maybe the world is getting scarier and my convictions are becoming conflictions because my kids are getting older. They are paying attention more, asking more questions and it freaks me the f@*& out.

I'm still all those things that I mentioned previously, but just add slightly conservative and anxious tween parent to the list.

I linked up with MamaKat's Vlogging prompts again to discuss some hot topics.  My hot topics involve my feminist confliction/reaction about Seth MacFarlane's boob song at the Oscars and the hideous new Skecher's shoes for girls and teens called "Daddy's Money."  Yeah, here's my confliction about that.

(If you get the blog via email subscription, here's the link for the video: )

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The amazing MamaKat (check her out, she is FUNNY).  Each week she has a list of vlog prompts and we all get to play along.


  1. OMG - with you on those sneakers. so gross. great articles about them on babble and rants from mommyland.

    1. Aren't the shoes just beyond horrible? Ugh. Thanks for the links Jen!

  2. Interesting post, Angela. Two of my sons chose to get their ears (one each, anyway) pierced when they were about seven or eight.

    I think I cringed a little at the time, but didn't have a good answer to the question you raised - "Why can't they?"

    One removed his after a couple months and the other lasted a couple years.

    1. Dan! I love that your boys pierced their ears!!!

  3. I get where you are coming from on these conflictions though I'm ok with tattoos and piercings...but there's plenty of other things that make me feel like a hypocrite.