Wednesday, August 10, 2011

What would Pam Ewing do?

Plunging stock markets.  One of the worst days on Wall Street.   As I glanced at my Yahoo homepage I felt panicky, kind of like the world was ending.

I don't don't have a lot of money invested in the stock market....okay admittedly I don't have any money invested.   But remember my nickname is roller coaster.  If the news tells me it is the worst day in the world I go there.  Then tomorrow or next week when there is a recovery, like none Wall Street has ever seen, I go there too.

Up and down and all around....I go there.  

Basically I am that chick that is constantly trying to control something, anything in life.  Even though I know it is a futile effort.  I literally need to get a grip.

My coping strategies with this crazy world involve very complicated, intricate analyzation of tv.

For example, when I met my husband's family I thought I was marrying into a family like The Waltons.  No one was divorced,  they all seemed so wholesome.  And there were a lot of them.

Well not too long after we were married, I discovered this family was more like the Ewings from Dallas and I needed to get a grip. But as I mature I realize all families are like the Ewings, right?  Doesn't everyone have this cast of characters:
  • the ego-maniac uncle/brother/husband---JR
  • the hopeful, naive at times, trusting, conflicted uncle/brother/husband---Bobby
  • the depressed, addicted, misunderstood uncle/brother/husband--Gary
  • the rebellious, fun-loving, spunky niece/daughter/grand-daughter---Lucy
  • the strong, stoic, maddending-ly accepting and overlooking, righteous mother/grandmother/matriarch type--Miss Ellie
  • the idolized, tough-loving father/grandfather--Jock
  • the sweet, virtuous, driven, lovable daughter/sister/wife--Pammy who turned into Pamela
  • the troubled, insecure, somewhat bitter, but rooted for daughter/sister/wife--Sue Ellen
Okay, I could go on and on, but think about it.  And maybe everyone doesn't have a JR.  But really the Waltons were boring anyway.

The realization that I married into the Ewings, minus Southfork Ranch (thank god we don't all live together) and the hired help, was interesting, but not life-changing.  That moment came in yet another therapy session, that's right another session.  I believe therapy is like getting your furnace checked....every 10 years you need to get checked out to make sure everything is still working properly.  

Anyway, I was sitting on the couch talking about some stuff and totally talking about myself like I was sweet, virtuous, driven and lovable, like little Pammy Ewing.  As I spoke I thought, holy shit, I sound troubled, insecure and somewhat bitter.  Oh my god!!!! That was the day I discovered I was Sue Ellen Ewing.

It was life changing.  

Doesn't this look like a Dallas pose?  Don't even ask why I was posing so inappropriately...remember I am the Sue Ellen in this situation.
So now on days when the world is up and down, I do panic a bit.  But unlike Sue Ellen I don't reach for the bottle or any other destructive method of coping.  Okay, I might drink a little.  But mostly I think "What would Pam Ewing do?"  I think she might say something like "Bobby, we have to make the best of it and I will get a job at the clothing store in town or ask my brother Cliff to help out."

If you think I am obsessed with Dallas, you haven't even read anything yet.  Wait til I start writing about Thirtysomething, possibly the greatest show on television ever.  

And by god, these shows, albeit old, are so much better than watching the news.


  1. OK, at this point, my 3rd reply to your blog tonight (I have been on vacation, unable to read, but anyway), you are probably thinking I am quite the stalker/really wanna be your friend. . .BUT, once again. . .you hit my buttons. I LOVED DALLAS and can totally relate! My dad used to "babysit" us on Friday nights and we would watch Dallas together. Love it! keep it comin' girl!

  2. I just laughed out loud reading about your dad "babysitting." Love it! Thank you so much for reading Amy!!!!!!!