Monday, April 2, 2012

Just Like A Mother of Four

I am a mother of four.  Some people ask "How do you do it?" My usual answer is "Not well."

Spring break has sprung in our house.  A whole week off from school.  A week that was supposed to include a getaway to see family, but because of a stomach bug, we will be staying home.  Staying home for the entire spring break.

One weekend in, and it's not looking so good.

But damn it, I refuse to sweat the small stuff. (Even though one time I knew a guy, a great guy, that always quoted that "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" book and then he died suddenly and I became more neurotic than ever. Ugh.)  That's the biggest lesson of being a mom of four.  I make decisions that moms of one may not make.  I worry less about some things.  Some people (moms of one cutie patootie toddler) may judge me or gasp while they continue to read.  But some other people, even people with only two or three kids, may do the same things that I do.  

As a mom of four I let my kids sleep in their pee.  If they are still sleeping, I let them.  If they wake up, I simply put a towel or blanket over the pee spot and lay them back down.  Changing the sheets in the middle of the night is for suckers.  It will be there in the morning and that's when I take care of it.

As a mom of four, I like a bargain.  Not being one of those crafty, coupon-clipping mommy bloggers, I have to get my bargains where I can.  For example, if my kids wants to play with a roll of toilet paper, throwing it around the house, I say go for it.  Sure, it's messy, but it's good, cheap fun. (Same goes for a box of Q-tips, bag of balloons or emptying the DVD cabinet.)

As a mom of four, statements like "I lost my baby at Walgreens" don't send me into a tailspin.  For example, yesterday, I thought it wouldn't be such a bad thing to give the baby some roaming space at Walgreens.  I mean, c'mon it's not a big store and he is 2 1/2. Well, of course I lost him and did have a moment of heart pounding panic, until the a very nice woman brought him to me asking "is this who you are looking for?" If this had happened to my first born I would've hated myself and cried for hours.  Now? Nope, this mom of four just keeps on keeping on, thankful for the kindness of strangers.

As a mom of four, I grab moments of joy where I can.  When I asked who wanted to see the Easter Bunny and two out of three of the kids I had with me raised their hands, we went.  Did I care that part of JT's hair was blue(from an earlier attempt at being fun which included colored hair spray)? Nope.  Or that Lucy thought the Easter Bunny was "disturbing?" Nope.  Or that baby Wade was wearing a super hero shirt and had snot running out of his nose? Nope.
Lucy is so disturbed, which brings me so much joy.  Wrong? Maybe. Funny? Yes.
As a mom of four, I realize I will miss stuff.  My oldest was gone at a baseball tournament this past weekend. He was with his dad making some crazy wonderful memories.  A couple years ago, I would've been so sad that I missed moments.  Life-changing, character building, clutch-hitting moments.  But a few kids later and I realized that I will indeed miss moments.  But I will be here for the retelling and sometimes that is grander.  I get to here my boy tell me how he got the great hit in his words,  with his eyes wide and his face flushed with pride. 

As a mom of four, I have a little perspective.  I will be the first to tell you that giving up a career, an identity, a reason to put on clothes and make-up is fucking hard.  No feedback, no job approval rating except "epic fail" and "you're the worst mom."  It can suck.  But, I feel so grateful to be a mother to these four little beings.  I love laughing with, and at, all the crazy, wonderful, hard, painful, ridiculous, love-filled, funny, absurd, sweet moments with my kids.

Watch this guy.  He's funny about how motherhood is so not the hardest job in the world.  Seriously, this guy is kind of an asshole and simplifies motherhood, but funny. Watch and laugh, like a mother of four.

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